How do I be my girlfriend's cheerleader, not her coach?

Dear Mother,

I love that my girlfriend of 8 years has progressed from puzzle games, which scare me, to the kinds of games I grew up playing: Action games with horror and combat. Nothing beats cooking up snacks for her as she fights demons in Silent Hill F, Fatal Frame and Elden Ring.

However Mother, I have a problem. I've forgotten how to be patient and I try to help her when I can see a pattern that she doesn't yet have the experience to perceive. She gets frustrated. First at the game — I wouldn't try to help otherwise. Then at me.

She is always just short of "getting it" so I try to point out the final pieces — an enemy's stagger flash, the best place to stand when she's too close to a wall, what button to push when the control scheme confuses her. Naturally I should be patient as she is learning and developing her skills but I've forgotten how!

How can I be my girlfriends biggest fan? All the above is muscle memory for me.

- Gamer Girlfriend

Hey Gamer Girlfriend,

Thanks for writing in with this, one of the most universal human experiences of all time: watching someone fail at something you already know how to do, and wanting to pull your hair out. Feeling this feeling in a gaming session is tough, because the whole point is for one person to experience playing the game, so offering to do it yourself wouldn't help.